Weapons of Mass Destruction

As the story always goes, the argument veers to one direction: Women ultimately dress to impress women, NOT men. Of course, this is debatable on so many different levels. We can always assume that one woman couldn't give a damn what other women are wearing and will leave their apartment wearing lingerie with hooker heels if she pleases. This isn't always the case, however. Some women will find an outfit, any outfit that will put to shame any woman who crosses her path. A tool she sharpens to spear her fashion-frenzied opponents. By analyzing current trends, being aware of product availability and witnessing the fluctuating fashion focus of Hollywood celebrities, women gather this data, create mental charts to bid on the best options, carefully budget (or charge their Amex) and make their final decision as they invest in one of the most seemingly-innocent yet painfully-destructive accessories to date: Their handbag.

Yes. a simple concept, really. Handbags are worn by almost everyone, carting about everyday necessities: agendas, make up, stationery, wallets, hygiene products, you name it. From a simple bag to an extravagant carry case, women compete daily with one another to carry the best of the best. At least in New York. At an upscale salon in New York, women come dressed to the 9's, wearing the latest and the most expensive ensembles, topped off with a gorgeous hand held. Jealous eyes scan the floor, as women carrying the lesser-than version think to themselves, "I should have gone with my Birkin bag, not my Louis Vuitton!"

Marshal Cohen, chief analyst for the Port Washington, NY, research firm NPD Group claims that, "It's the difference between buying a Rolls Royce at $300,000 and buying a Rolls Royce at $150,000," he says. "There's really little difference at some point; it's the status that comes along with it and the desire to separate yourself." Clearly, we can associate the crocodile Birkin bag as the equivalent to the Business class seats aboard United, while the Gucci hobo bag you thought was still an expensive purchase is the equivalent to seat 27D. It's a small plane but you're still the very last seat on the ride.

All across the island of Manhattan, women strive to carry the very best available handbag in their financial reach. For others, a splurge that goes beyond their budget is their only means of survival. For some men, a beautiful girl by his side means he is either financially successful or has the skills to attain attractive women. For other men, a great watch or sleek car shows that he has what it takes. The ultimate badge for most women most likely lies in the vicinity of an expensive accessory. Whether its a timepiece, jewelry, or handbag, these women know that they are raising their flag to warn others that they are "not to be messed with".

So, if you are fashionably "in-it-to-win-it" and think you are carrying a top-of-the-line tote, note that woman in the front of the line at Starbucks is carrying something bigger and better. Let the games begin!